Tuesday, February 19, 2008


Rhysaurus Rex

A few posts ago I mentioned that issue 1 of Polluto was going to publish my prog-rock fantasia ‘Cracking Nuts with Jan Hammer.’ In fact that story will appear in issue 2. It turns out that issue 1 contains the entirety of my ‘Mr Gum’ novella, all five parts. ‘Mr Gum, the Creative Writing Tutor’ is one of my most vicious and justified satires. It attacks with filth and menace that most detestable of pseudo-academic pretensions: the creative writing class.

In the history of the universe only one decent person has ever attended a creative writing class. All other attendees are patsies and all tutors of such classes are talentless fakes. Writing cannot be taught: there is nothing to teach. If you want to be a writer, then WRITE. Be published or be damned! Don’t look to creative writing tutors for guidance. Remember: they aren’t famous, they aren’t successful. How can they possibly help you?

(the first in an occasional series of quasi-Imperial announcements)

sagacious.................oh no sorry; malign
Bumtentious I'll be bound. There wiil be letters.
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