Tuesday, April 09, 2013


Thatcher is Dead -- Rejoice!!

O frabjous day! Callooh! Callay!

Thatcher is dead! The tyrant is dead!
Time to party, time to dance!
I have been awaiting this event for a long time. I am delighted...

Nine years ago I wrote an article that accurately predicted the death of Thatcher. In order to celebrate the real event, here's the piece I wrote... Bouffant Terrible.

I wrote this especially for the first Forum Fantastico in Lisbon in 2004 and read it aloud to a room of people including Safaa Dib, Luís Rodrigues, Pedro Piedade Marques and various other fine and excellent individuals.

Yes, it may be a little childish to celebrate the death of Thatcher. But the genuinely mature person knows that it's healthy and necessary to be childish at certain times. To insist on permanent maturity is a very juvenile attitude.

Besides, different responses suit different personalities. I am a hotheaded red blooded male, so to have a contemplatative and gentle response to this event would be unnatural and wrong and probably unhealthy for me; whereas if I was a more subudued individual then sitting in a chair with a big chin and being philosophical might be the right response for me. We are all different and when it comes to an emotional response one size does not fit all. I plan to paste her face onto a melon later today and use an old Italian épée to give it some juicy punishment. This isn't something I recommend to everyone, but I certainly recommend it to myself. Others might just prefer to have a cup of tea.

The fact that we all have different temperaments is something that 'maturity wankers' like Claire Rayner never understood and something that her pop-psychology epigones will never understand. They think that because they have "reasonable" (timid) souls, everyone should have "reasonable" (timid) souls and thus "reasonable" (timid) emotional responses. But sometimes the knife blade in the ribs is the correct response. Ask any ancient Corsican...

Another thing... You don't have to be left-wing or even a liberal to hate Thatcher. One thing that is rarely talked about is how she destroyed the old original values of the Tory Party. Before Thatcher the Conservatives also believed in social justice (Disraeli was responsible for more progressive reforms than Gladstone ever was) but they wanted change to be slower -- and thus less disruptive -- than the Socialists did. Evolution rather than Revolution... Thatcher spat on the One-Nation ideals of Disraeli and changed the party for the worse and ultimately gave us the bunch of bastards we have now...

You have a 'mature' response to her death if you want to. This fellow's not for maturing...

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